12 Down
Last night was a bad night, a long night. We processed the entire remains of the Black Hawk helicopter that went down in Tell-Afar. The good part of the story was that the crash itself was the product of an immediate dismissal. It was found approximately two hours after it crashed and was the result of bad weather. There was no fire.
In addition to our regular crew, we had the Command Sergeant Major, the Battalion Commander, a Colonel with his men, and a visit by a two star general who was also accompanied by personal escorts. It was good to see all these soldiers here to help out, join in and show both their support and respect.
The room in which our work is done was more crowed then I had ever seen it. In part because of the extra “brass” that was in town, but mainly it was the numbers.
I’m getting use to this job. I got use to the dark. I got use to riding a bike. You can get use to a lot of things.
Look at the case.
Open the case.
Look at the bag.
Unzip the bag.
Look.
Look away.
Inventory everything.
Ask yourself questions.
Think.
Look again.
Zip the bag.
Position the ice.
Close the case.
Look at the case.
Process the paper work.
Lay the Flag.
Look at the flag.
Load.
Walk away.
Repeat eleven times.
The spouse of one of the deceased was at a nearby camp. She came to where we were. She was there to be with her husband and to escort him home. She wanted to see him, but decided not too. That was the worst part of the night. My vote doesn’t compare.
The Command Sergeant Major gave me a coin for duty last night. It was gesture of service, a token of appreciation. It’s a good thing, but I don’t deserve it. I don’t want it.
Twelve soldiers got flags last night.
I got a coin.
~Rolligun
In addition to our regular crew, we had the Command Sergeant Major, the Battalion Commander, a Colonel with his men, and a visit by a two star general who was also accompanied by personal escorts. It was good to see all these soldiers here to help out, join in and show both their support and respect.
The room in which our work is done was more crowed then I had ever seen it. In part because of the extra “brass” that was in town, but mainly it was the numbers.
I’m getting use to this job. I got use to the dark. I got use to riding a bike. You can get use to a lot of things.
Look at the case.
Open the case.
Look at the bag.
Unzip the bag.
Look.
Look away.
Inventory everything.
Ask yourself questions.
Think.
Look again.
Zip the bag.
Position the ice.
Close the case.
Look at the case.
Process the paper work.
Lay the Flag.
Look at the flag.
Load.
Walk away.
Repeat eleven times.
The spouse of one of the deceased was at a nearby camp. She came to where we were. She was there to be with her husband and to escort him home. She wanted to see him, but decided not too. That was the worst part of the night. My vote doesn’t compare.
The Command Sergeant Major gave me a coin for duty last night. It was gesture of service, a token of appreciation. It’s a good thing, but I don’t deserve it. I don’t want it.
Twelve soldiers got flags last night.
I got a coin.
~Rolligun
posted by Rolligun at 11:07 AM
9 Comments:
This made me cry. Thank you so much for what you do. It means a lot to the families. Thank you.
You do deserve it.
It may not seem that way.
But you do.
I understand that getting the coin seems kind of surreal but remember the thought behind it. I think the families would have some comfort in the fact that there is someone who cares that is taking care of their loved one.
"So Angels, GO abide with God; our memories of you will never cease.
Thank you for being there for them.
You may have placed some other symbolism on the coin but to me it signifies "Intestinal Fortitude". Few people could accomplish the job you have accepted. It would drive most people absolutely Batshit as they would not be able to produce an adequate coping mechanism to deal with it. The mere overwhelming of the senses by the sights and smells cause many to faint straight away...without actually seeing any portion of tissue. The fact that personal effects are no longer clean and shiny escapes many until they see it. You accomplish what many others are unable to do and have the intestinal fortitude to deal with the physical and psychological nastiness of up close and personal traumatic death. Troop, you are a member of a very, very small club which extracts a high price from its membership. I suspect your Cmd. SgtMaj knows this all too well.
BTW, The coping mechanisms you’re using are normal. Keep using them. Dealing with families is the hardest of all as it personalizes the event. Tough, tough job…
As for the question:
have you earned this coin? You bet your ass you have, good or bad thing that it may be.
As for whether you want it or not:
that is a personal choice. What you do with it is up to you although, I would suggest that you keep it as a place to put your in country experiences. When you get down to one day and a wake up, you will know what to do with it… and thank you for doing that which others cannot do.
Sorry this is so long but your blog begged this reply...
Semper Fi
My heart aches for you RG... I have to echo what everyone else has said here already, especially anon.
You give these people the dignity and respect they so richly deserve.
You have my respect and admiration for what you do, always...
I'd rather you get a coin than a flag anytime Rolli. What you do is awesome, don't downplay it.
Mommy,
Thanks for the support.
And Please don't cry on my blog.
Meghan
Are you pointing your finger?
Kate,
I'm not the only one, there are plenty of soldiers over here.
Laurie,
thank you for the kind words. I'll write more here and there about it, when appropriate.
Janie,
Well said...
Semper Fi,
Thanks for sharing. You definately live by your credo.
I apprecitate what you have said, and how it was written. I will continue to take it all into consideration.
BG,
The dignity and respect you speak of is huge part of it all. Nobody here takes it lightly.
Steph,
I'm just trying to put into perspective.
Thank you
Auburn,
Welcome back, I knew something hadn't been quite right with this blog...I just figured out what it was.
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